Ford C-Max: A Review
Last year, just before Thanksgiving, I ordered a brand spankin new Ford C-Max Hybrid. Fresh outta the gate, it's offering 47 mpg, city AND highway, with 47mpg combined.
I test drove a Chevy Sonic (loved it), a Hyundai Elantra (looks great, interior great, but powered by an anemic hamster with COPD), a Ford Focus (drives great, but cramped inside), and a Ford Fusion (AWE-SOME car)... and Ford C-Max Hybrid.
The C-Max wowed me the most. The promise of gas mileage, an engaging ride, a really nice interior, plenty of room, and what I think are just totally unique looks. The Ford Sync as well. I considered the Sync Touch, but it's not worth the extra $2,000.
So I ordered mine on Nov 19, 2012. I was told 4 weeks to ship, so I should have gotten it just before Christmas... alas, no.
It didn't ship till 2 days after Valentine's Day in 2013. I ordered it in such a combination, no one else had one like me. So it had to be made from scratch, just down the road in Wayne. That's cool. I'm sorry if you don't understand that part, but to me, the idea that this car was built just 10 minutes down I-275 from me is just cool.
Mine's blue. Like really, really blue. The interior is light great and dark grey/not quite black. It is quite fetching, with a strong, yet comfortable fiber. The seats are mushy, but stiff, and possibly a wee bit too short for my long legs, but still quite functional. Every surface I can reach from the driver's seat is soft touch, except a faux chrome over the stereo bits.
Sync has a bit of a "bad" reputation, and I can see where it comes from. It requires you already have some manner of digital comprehension. You know how to use Windows, and an iPod or Android. The concepts are the same. if you understand these things, then Sync makes sense. if you don't, then Sync is intimidating and foreign. That's all. For me, it works perfectly. No real issues. My phone connected lickity split. It understands my voice, and the keys are easy to use, really. They just didn't design it for those without basic digital literacy.
The ride quality is excellent. I prefer it greatly. It's smooth, sharp, and only has a mild roll. The tires are not very grippy, so it's not as good in the winter as an SUV would be. Speaking of the tires... there is no spare. This scares me a bit, but I'm powering through it, but you know I will be pissed to hell if I blow a tire, and cannot get back... and have to 'call' a phone number. Duh. Poor forethought on that to all automakers who don't care if a deaf person get stranded with a blown tire. Be forewarned, Ford...
Now, how about that engine? The 2.0l works extremely well in combination with the electrical engine. It has more power than you'd expect. It does not drive like anything except a car. It merges well, it passes well... it's extremely pleasant. before this, I drove a Nissan Rogue, with a CVT. The C-Max also has a CVT, and that CVT was excellent... but the C-Max actually is BETTER than the Rogue because it has MORE POWER. It accelerates faster and smoother. It drives like a really nice car. You don't sense you're in anything different.
Now, before I launch into a spiel about the gas mileage... you'll note this is a splendid review. I really like my C-Max. It was a great great choice. It fits me well. I love driving the thing.
But the gas mileage is no where NEAR the claim. I'm getting around 37.7mpg after almost 3 months of driving it, and 2500 miles. On some trips, you can get around 40... but the average is 37. Why so low?
Ford's claiming "you have to learn how to drive it" to get 47 mpg. Well, no one has to learn how to drive the old Ford Fusion Hybrid to get it's advertised mileage, or the advertised mileage on a Toyota Prius. I'm sorry Ford, but you guys made a spectacular car. I LOVE my C-Max... but it's never, EVER going to average 47mpg to a tank of gas because it can't do it. And if I have to learn how to drive to get that mileage... then where's the training to do so? MPG should match the "average" driver, not some hypermiling expert on a perfect 3 % negative grade test track.
So there you have it: I love my C-Max. I like the 37mpg I'm getting. But Ford, you lied. It ain't gonna get 47 mpg.
Best of 2012
In this fabulous edition... I will disclose the best movies of 2012, purely from my own opinions! This is based on the films I have actually seen, so it's possible better films from the year exist: I just haven't seen them at the time of writing.
1. The Avengers
This was the best thing made this year. Yes, it has some plot difficulties, and the science is iffy in spots... Who cares? It is pure, escapist entertainment on the level of the original Star Wars, Raiders of the Lost Ark, and The Matrix. Whedon was the PERFECT choice to pull this together, and the cast works together splendidly. Why didn't they cast Ruffalo as the Hulk in the first place? Show stopper!
2. Lincoln
Really, an amazingly well told story... but it's not really about "Lincoln". It's about the 13th Amendment, and the political process required to get there. Lincoln's just the cog around which the story revolves. All of the acting is stupendous, and it might well be one of the absolutely best movie's that Spielberg has ever put out.
3. Chronicle
I really enjoyed this "found footage" film about 3 teens who stumble upon the unknown, and discover great powers... and how it changes their lives. It really is well done storytelling. Dane DeHaan is a revelation in this movie, looking like a creepier teen version of Leo DiCaprio. Highly Recommended, but not everyone will like this as much as I did.
4. Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter
Now, I know a lot of reviewers savaged this, but this clever retelling of historical events has a few twists for a Civil War geek like myself that I really enjoyed. It does get a bit slow in spots, but otherwise, it does a great job of killing a couple hours. Parts of it made me laugh out loud, and parts made me lean forward in my seat. It's great popcorn fare!
5. The Hobbit
Blasphemy! I know. I ranked "Vampire Hunter" above "the Hobbit", but only because the beginning was so. very. slow. I have extremely high hopes for "The Desolation of Smaug" next year, so the movie suceeded in what in set out to do: set the table. But I am worried about the "stretch marks" that are apparent in this movie. I mean, they're turning a 350 page YA book into 3 movies, and it shows in spots. Otherwise, its a SPLENDID return to Middle Earth! This was a RIOT in the theater... a group behind us was SHOCKED at the ending, exclaiming "WHAT? That's IT!?!?" as if surprised it would end before the story was over. Really, what freaking rock were those guys stuck under!?!?!
6. The Bourne Legacy
I enjoyed the story telling in this. It wraps itself around the previous trilogy, while injecting new ideas. It veers completely off from the Bourne book series (by Ludlum, and later by Van Lustbader). Jeremy Renner is excellent as the neo-Bourne successor, Aaron Cross. Like "The Hobbit", it ends quite illogically, without a proper crescendo. It reaches the peak slowly, then simply ends in the middle of a chase. It DID leave me wanting more.
7. The Hunger Games
I am a fan of the books, and I was looking forward to this movie. The vision of the movie on screen isn't quite as dark as my imagination painted it, but it is extremely well done and well told. The actors fit the rolls (except Josh Hutcherson, who seems nowhere near as strong as I'd pictured Peeta Mallark, but Jennifer Lawrence is PERFECTLY cast as Katniss Everdeen. I am very much looking forward to the sequels.
8. Haywire
This vehicle for MMA vet Gina Carano is actually a fabulously taut movie. Carano is seriously good in the role of Mallory Kane, and you really have no problem believing this brunette beauty is capable of kicking many, many asses. LOVE the supporting cast, which is almost a who's who of thrillers. Fassbender, Michael Douglas, Bill Paxton, Ewan McGregor, and I've only scratched the surface. Superbly done, except the plot is paint by numbers, and the twists are overtly choreographed.
9. Amazing Spiderman
Now we get into the movies I saw, but don't have a really positive opinion of. Seriously, WHY did this need to be made? The Sam Raimi helmed series is still very fresh in memory, and this just feels like going back to the well a bit too soon. Don't get me wrong, Andrew Garfield is really quite good at this (but I kept waiting for him to talk about suing Mark Zuckerberg...), but Tobey Maguire really owned the roll in the first 2 Spidey movies... so I'm torn on this. Was I entertained? Yep. Was I blown away? No. Am I waiting for more? Nope.
10. The Dark Knight Rises
I really wanted to like this movie. But I was really terribly disappointed in it. It drags SO bad, and Bane is such a supremely disappointing let down as a villain. His dramatic liturgies have no impact because of a dopey mask, and a lispy/breathy voice so terrible, you keep waiting for him to announce he's Bruce Wayne's father. A HUGE let down of an ending to what should have been an epic series.
(just missing the cut: Ted, Prometheus, and the turkey of the year: John Carter).
2012
This may be early, so I'll start it early and often:
2012?
You suck. Just go. Let the damn door hit you in the ass on the way out.
My year started with the CPAP chronicles and illogicality of BCBSM... a very sore hip, which I worked hard to get strengthened, then I broke my leg in April. That's chronicled quite aptly in earlier entries of my blog.
They gave me too many pain killers in the hospital and destroyed my hearing. I missed a month and a half of work. Physical therapy was ended early by BCBSM, then I had a Cochlear Implant (also outlined in detail in my blog) which kicked my ass terribly... so I struggled to get myself together. And I failed. Now I end my year undergoing testing because I'm enormously fat and out of shape because I still can't get around very well due to my leg. Somehow, I have to find a way to get physically active.
My uncle had a heart attack in August, and it's just a miracle he survived. We were all terribly worried for him... but Uncle Chuck is too tough to get knocked down for long.
This week has been enormously shitty. I had to do another sleep test (titrating a cpap... which I bought myself. Screw BCBSM on this.) Then I had to get bloodwork done the next morning at my Dr's office, whom I had to berate into explaining with the hell I was being sent to the hospital for... and advise them that calling a deaf guy on the phone is a meaningless exercise and immensely ignorant.
There's actually more here, but I can't really talk about all of it due to gossip. Alas. This may be my last post for a long while.
Let me summarize this…
The election is over. Barack Obama will get 4 more years to write his memoir. Whether good or bad, this post isn't so much about the victory, but about the issues... which no election should EVER be about.
Note One: Dear assholes, stop using that word (entitlements). I do not think it means what you think it means.
Social Security and Medicare are NOT entitlements. They're PAID FOR. I've worked now for over 20 years, and the entire time I've work, I've paid taxes for Social Security and Medicare. When it's my time to collect those, I'm not "entitled" to those: I PAID FOR IT.
An entitlement is something you think you're owed and never worked a minute for. I am not entitled to anything except freedom. I paid for SS/Medicare. My Dad did. Your parents did. So please, learn what the heck the word means.
If SS and Medicare aren't there when I need them, then I've been robbed, and should have the right to sue the Federal Government for it. I've already paid hundreds of thousands into these things. I'm OWED these things because I PAID FOR IT.
Does that make sense to you? Either way, you're "entitled" to your opinion. (See how that works?)
Note Two:
Some of you need to own up to a simple fact: you're not against the Democrats. You're against the black Democrat in the highest office of the land.
There is no logical argument for the maintenance of a racist point of view in this world. We are the United States of America, and we have grown up past that childish phase of existence. Please, stop being racist. Stop teaching your children racism. GROW. UP.
If you enter any sort of argument to support your "opinion", you are simply amplifying the reality that YOU are mentally immature and incapable of being a productive member of society.
Note Three:
The White Majority is dead. There is no majority: just US.
I believe a white person SHOULD be able to have pride in themselves, but the form this pride takes is often wrong (KKK, anyone?). I take pride in knowing my ancestors were hard working people from Ireland, and magnificent Cherokee warriors from the plains.
Ignore the "majority" of color. It infects all manners of people, causing them to fragment themselves from the whole for the sake of meaninglessness. Consider the case of the Black Panthers at the polls in 2012... What the hell was the point of that? What did anyone's agenda achieve by having dudes in silly berets at the polls, tying to look strong, but looking like they took too much Metamucil before they got there. There IS a difference between 'I'm "strong and proud" and "I gotta poop real bad!".
Racism is a terrible thing. Get interested in a more interesting and productive group: WE. THE PEOPLE. Of the United States of America.
Let us drop this silly preface of racism, and form a more perfect union.
Note Four:
Now, a more localized opinion.
Matty Moroun...A Moron with U in it.
"Let the people decide" was a $42 million bullshit cry. The people decided, and buried his lies. Now, he's threatening to sue the state until it surrenders. His billions vs the State of Michigan. Cause that's what we decided, right? Was was his $42 millon campaign on "Let the people decide" a smoke screen and lie?
Actions speak louder than words, Matty. You're a defunct obstructionist. WE SPOKE.. and if you sue the state over this stuff, you'll have spoken ever more loudly and clearly that Matty Maroun doesn't give a shit about the entire state of Michigan. How you gonna win then? No matter how many billions of dollars you have, there's still more of US than there is of U.
iPad Mini vs iPad 2 – Summary
I was once told that some people would prefer to have a large tablet, which would be easier to read. The iPad mini as a diagonal viewing space of 7.9", which is slightly larger than my Google Nexus 7.
The iPad 2 has a 9.7" viewable screen. Then "density" of pixels between the 2 is 132 (ipad 2) vs 163 (ipad Mini). The screen resolution is the same: 1024 x 768.
Due to the size, the mini is LIGHTER, but only by 0.6 lbs.
The mini cost $329 new. The iPad 2 cost $399 new.
Now, they both have the same processor (an A5 processor) and run exactly the same speed. The mini has a slightly better camera resolution, but not terribly so. Both have front and back facing cameras.
You can also order both with just WIFI or with 3G connections. The 3G connection versions are going to cost much more either way. the 3G/Wifi version pricing is a bigger discrepancy, and would tilt towards the iPad mini ($499 vs $529 for the iPad 2) if that is part of your considerations (it would mean he could use a tablet ANYWHERE there's a phone signal, but you also pay monthly rates like an cell phone device).
Essentially, the screen size is easier to read on the iPad 2 than the iPad mini, but the functionality of both is essentially the same. There is no difference is the iOS versions, or what they can do. Apple DOES keep some "goodies" specifically for the mini that are NOT accessible on the iPad 2 (Apple Maps, for one), but these are minor. If screen size and readability are more important, then you'll want to consider the iPad 2.
If having the "goodies" is more important than screen size, then I'm sure anyone would enjoy the iPad mini too.
Just a note that you can have either one "inscribed" by Apple for a small fee as well 
With either, I would see about getting a nice case for it. I find when the tablet is in a nice case, it will look "new" and inviting well past purchase date. The ones that don't have a case will get scratched and "worn" on the back after a year or so of use. If the case gets worn out, you can always get a new one, and your tablet still looks "perfect".
Now, the monkey wrench in this analysis: If an extra $100 isn't an issue, I would TOTALLY look at the top end iPad, the iPad with Retina Display ($499 for the 16GB Wifi model). This is the "latest" iPad version, is a full 9.5" viewable (same size as the iPad 2), but the screen is MUCH more crisp, featuring 264dpi (just below the average human visual acuity peak of 300dpi). That is the "king" of all tablets right now, closely followed by the recently released Google Nexus 10 (a whole different ball game, but only cost $399 new with 300dpi screen, available Nov 13th).
You can see the basic stats for all models at: https://www.apple.com/ipad/compare/
Dreams with Deep Thought
Just woke up. I wirte this is staggered haze.
I was on a deserted place. We were driving around in a 4x4's. Me, Richard Hammond, 2 friends from HS, my brother, and my cousin.
I drove a Vespa around the Indy 500 race track, but blew it because it started skipping gears, so I lost the race.
Then we ended up in a bar, on teh isle of Man. My brother and one of the HS friends returned from shopping, with lost of polyester jogging suits.
Richard Hammond was theer, and got intoa fight with one of my HS friends, who punched Richard so hard that Mr. Hammond's skull folded up like an accordian.
"Dude, he's musical insturment now. You killed Top Gearm, you bastard. You realize I have to kill you now?"
"Rats" The friend walks up to me. "Is it gonna hurt?"
"Dude, of course it ain't gonna hurt. You're a figment of my imagination. Do figments of imagination feel pain?"
"Only if you want me to."
"Well, okay, just for a split second then."
Then I drove his nose through his brain with the top of my head.
He said "ouch" and dropped comically dead. The curtain went up and the crowd began to applaud.
My eyes opened and I was like "Huh? I wonder... does a person in your dreams feel pain if they get hurt? erm. We'll see.
Amalgamate Now?
Sometimes in your life, there are spans of time when the definition of your life is writ large, across the face of reality like graffiti. Everyone within eye sight, ear shot, a tongue flick can see, smell and taste everything that is about to happen... and have no idea what it feels like.
At this moment, my life is a storage closet of chaos. Life without definition, but full of cluster, sound and fury.
I just spent a half hour researching Cochlear Implants. I read someone elses blog on this process and broke down crying because it just hit me how freaking much... yeah, i can't even verbalize it yet, really.
I haven't heard much of anything since May.
My leg is healing from being broken.
I have ingrown toenail in my left big toe... which sucks terribly. Yeah, that's what I needed there: MORE FUCKING PAIN IN MY LEFT LEG...
Tomorrow, I am getting a CAT scan for the express purposes of getting a Cochlear Implant.
I am beyond fucking terrified. I want to jump in my car and drive away, I want to hide and pretend everything is okay. Just tell me it's okay, and tell me it'll be alright. Jesus, I'm sick and tired of this year. Everything is breaking and I'm having to stand strong and tall and pretend I'm the one who isn't affected... that I'll always be the tough guy, but this tough guy just wants to run away right now.
But I can't. Because this cochlear implant... if it works...
I'll hear my nephew again.
Maybe I'll hear my brother's new band.
Maybe I'll understand you all better, and be more involved socially.
MAYBE. I HOPE. I CAN HEAR.
How impressive. How horrible. How ridiculous. How sane. How completely and utterly impossible... or is it?
God please, let me get through this year. Let me hear everyone. Their voices, without having to ask twice. No more "what?"
This is the next step, isn't it? Evolution. I will be assimilated into the collective. My technological distinctiveness will be undeniable, and overwhelming... if I hear you all, and don't have to hide in the background anymore... can participate in group discussions... will I scare you? Will you accept this me, the real me, the hidden me?
Logically... It came down to to the Ellis Boyd Redding question... "get busy living, or get busy dying", just changed around to "get busy hearing, or get busy being deaf".
I don't think I could ever forgive myself if I didn't try. I really want to hear YOU.
I really want to hear my nephew, my cousin's kids... I even want to be able to say if modern music sucks, and not just be parroting someone else... I want to hear all that music I heard, the real thing, and not the tinny echo of my memory. I want to hear the argument across the table, at the meeting, or in the restaurant. My God... all I want to do is hear the sound of birds singing, or the cicada's (man eating sparrows) serenade... the toads on the pond, the sound of rain, thunder, and lightning... count how far away it is in miles, from flash to thunder. I don't want to make up your voices in my head anymore... like an equation of being able to tell what you sound like, just from what you look like.
or making up the sound of the room... here I sit typing, a fan next to me. I know I can't hear the fan, but my mind is making the sound of the fan. Cause it knows the sounds should be there, but it's not, so it makes it up... so it sounds like a fan, with someone playing a mournful guitar solo, bursting up high, holding the note in tremolo, and falling down, sadly, see the drops fall from the sky, like tears from my eyes.
You have no idea how lucky you are. No idea... just to hear the sound of a car door shut. That annoying screech of a baby crying. The nails on the chalkboard... just theories and memories at this point... relish I want in my life, once again.
How much can I take?
So, I'm still working on the healing thing. My Doctor tells me I can put 100% weight on by July 5th (my next appointment). I'll be at 75% this Tuesday...
I need to get back home by June 30th or my cat will starve. Can I climb the stairs? Yeah. But it's real slow.Is it safe? Not really, no. It's clumsy. There's no way I can do stuff like carry in groceries and such. Maybe i'll just have to go home for lunch and feed the cat? It could work.
I'm returning the CPAP this week as well. That was such a clusterfuck. Not using the CPAP itself, but the billing... terribly restrictive. But who cares? I already have my own CPAP, so why do I need to deal with these idiots? I'll take it back, and they can perch and twirl on it. My Doctor will be happy that I have one, and can use it... without some sneaky ass bastards trying to watch me breathe at night...
I'm also visiting with my hearing aid dealer to get a second opinion on my latest hearing test results. Is my hearing really so bad? We'll see. If she confirms it, I'll follow up with another ENT and hope they take me seriously. Geez, at least do some tests. I could have an ear wax plug or something making my ears ring, but the useless twats at MOSA ENT wouldn't know because their doctors don't actually see patients unless it's easy or whatever the heck.
(Note: Audiologist stated that my hearing test in 2008 is identical to my hearing test now. There is no difference. Not a good thing, really. Tinnitus sucks...)
I woke up Monday (6/25) morning with a lot of energy. Got myself to work quickly... but started to get dizzy on the drive in. Got in, tried to shake it off... then had to run/wheel to the bathroom and throw up. Left work, drove home, and fell asleep till 1pm. Felt marginally better. Made some coleslaw and had that for lunch. Started to feel better. Put my hearing aid back on... and started to feel worse... Monday: Not a good day, dammit.
I'm looking forward to fireworks on the 30th at Darcey and Jimmy's place. I'm looking forward to having a real vacation week someone around the end of July. I hope I can swim. I hope I can enjoy myself.
Pondering a new Normalcy
Beware: this post shall wander aimlessly...
I think I may be suffering some kind of PTSD associated with my broken leg. Example: while watching a movie tonight, my eye was caught by my cat, Fargo, who was on the floor in front of me. A cat toy (grey, made of rubber) was caught on his nail. But when I looked down, it looked like he was flapping a broken leg in the air. I screeched out "Holy shit, Fargo's leg is broken!".
He was flapping the cat toy, which was stuck to his paw... being the same color, it looked like he was limping around with a broken limb. I leapt to my feet, prepared to help my poor kitty... when he shook the toy off his nail and my dad is looking at me like "what is wrong with you?"
Alas.
Feeling "old" this week. A combination of things...
1. My birthday. 41. Nothing much happened for my birthday. at all.
2. <removed because some people are nosey and need to mind their own business.>
3. Work. My first day back... I had to fire someone. For very good reason, but I felt so... hilariously mature, like I was an adult Ferris Bueller would frown upon and say "why are you harshing my day, Cameron?" I felt OLD doing it. But oddly feeling that I only did what had to be done. And it got WORSE... "Welcome to As the Library Turns..." I can't even outline it all. Maybe someday... I sure hope the dumb ass wasn't on K2 or something, and shows up for blind drugged vengeance... but calling the police was necessary. Felt very much like the Syed incident at Noble, but amplified because I wasn't the direct victim, but I was the adult who said "we MUST call the police. It's the only thing we can do." Wonder if a court date comes up on it... I doubt it will be as funny as the Syed court was. Judge: "English, do you speak it???"
4. Hiring new people. 5 interviews in a week. Picked 2. They're so... young. And look at me like a mentor... like their boss. Which is kind of cool, and oddly responsible at the same time. Humbling, really. It is such responsibility to do it RIGHT.
5. Dealing with ye olde broken ankle/leg. I'm on a 25% plan until the 4th of July. 25% more weight per week, and I need to get into PT asap. Starting Monday, a friend from work is calling the PT at Providence Park for me to set up an appointment. I've started putting weight on it, and find some negative effects quickly... I had a large swelling of my foot and foreleg yesterday from walking around the house outside on crutches.
I so miss just being able to walk! a simple little walk around the house. Down the street. Up the stairs. I miss my own piece of shit condo.
6. Borg... it's looking more and more like I'm going to become the Six Million Dollar Borg. Assimilated into a collective of deaf. Confirming diagnosis... this sucks. Just what I need this year: more major surgery. six months of numb head and total deafness for up to a month, and NO guarantee the procedure would stop the tinnitus.
7. CPAP madness. Okay. BCBSM, I have a message for you: Your BS "30 days consecutive use" plan is completely inhumane. See all the stuff I've written above? I have way more important things to do in my life than sleep in only one way, with that shit shoved in my head. Will the CPAP save my life? maybe so. But all things in their place and time... your plan takes no comprehension to the fact that life changes daily. I'll just return the damn thing and buy one of my own online. Then I'll use the thing when I can without being monitored like Nazi America. My doctor will be thrilled then. And the company that would have sold me a CPAP? You just cost them a nice contract.
Returnth to Normal?
Tomorrow, next step on the way back to "normal". I go back to work...
I'm excited and scared about that. Excited because I've sat on my ass for the last 6 weeks. I can't sit on my ass no more.
I know the meaning of the word "laid up" and I don't wanna do it again.
I'm a bit scared, to be honest. After being in the house, and not leaving the house on my own... I'm going to drive to work, get out of the car, and scoot my knee walker, crutches, and a back pack full of lunch into the Library and work for as many hours as I can take (maybe 4 to 6 the first day, we'll see).
I have a bigger appreciation for the travails of what a handicapped person goes through, because at this point, I am really quite handicapped. I still can't walk. I'm a hoppin' fool. I've been away as long as I can take, and probably as long as work can take. The rough edges are showing and ripping up things.
And you know what? I'm not 100%. No. I'm not even 80%. I'm maybe 65% right now. I'm on one leg and...
no ears.
You read that right. As of now, you can and should consider me to be completely deaf. My latest hearing test results, if they are to be believed, were the worst ever. I'm suffering ringing that may or may not be full blown tinnitus in both ears, but I suspect are hyperacusis based (required sound to ring, which is the opposite of normal tinnitus.)
So, 5/25 I had an appointment with an ENT (Dr. Hoff of MOSA ENT). This Dr. was recommended by my family Dr.
They give me a hearing test... then have me come back, in which I see not the ENT doctor I was supposed to see, but his Physicians Assistant. Who summarily blows me off. At least that's what it felt like. "Oh, you're WAY too deaf! Go somewhere else, deaf boy!"
I'm "far too deaf" for them to help me, and they suggest cochlear implants. I have no business wearing hearing aids, they say. And these folks? They do not do cochlear implants.
Thusly, the dumb twinkers give me a PHONE NUMBER TO CALL for an appointment with someone else. Well... that was a total waste of my time, and if you're ever assigned to MOSA ENT... refuse, cause they probably don't care much. Pass the buck along, don't talk to the deaf guy and see if you can do anything, just take one tiny, abbreviated test that was cut short for no reason and say "screw you deaf guy" and send me out the door with a PHONE NUMBER!
Phone numbers are, of course, COMPLETELY WORTHLESS... especially according to their results.
What a fine mess I am. I'm THAT close to being the six Million Dollar man... fake leg. Fake ear. I just need nuclear powered limbs, and I'm all set... Lee Majors got NOTHIN' on me.
(Addendum on 6/25/2012)
I did a follow up appointment with my audiologist. I've dealt with them for years, and they hold the record of my last official hearing test in 2008.
So what were the results, you may ask?
NO CHANGE. There is NO CHANGE in my hearing between now and 2008. None.
Begging your damn pardon, but how is that possible?
Simple: My hearing is so awful, that upon learning of the results of a hearing test, an otherwise logical, perhaps excellent doctor will choose to steer me away from their practice. Why? maybe it's "too hard". My audiologist is "not a doctor", but she surmises that it's possibly, if not likely, that my recent tinnitus issues can be traced to all the pain drugs I was given in the hospital. Which would mean this issue is directly tied to the broken leg.
<sarcasm>Yay.</sarcasm>
My ears were ringing so bad today, I was throwing up. I'm afraid to find another ENT, because, well shit, maybe they'll throw me out of their office too. I wish I knew a lawyer, so I could find out if it's malpractice...