“Weird Al” lyrics

I was driven today after Weird Al's latest album release to create something, and chucked this nugget together while driving home... when I saw one of these things... thusly, an ode... to the Nissan Van. Imagine this to the tune of the seminal classic from the Pointer Sisters: Neutron Dance. I don't want to look at it anymore I'll just stay here locked behind the door just no time to stop and get away 'Caise the breakes don't work anyways whoo oooh, Whoo oooh There's no beauty in that facade 'Cause than van…Read more …

Nosey People

Some people have severe nose problems, and need to mind their own business. This message brought to you Thanks to a nosey person with severe gossipitis. You know who you are, and if you're reading this, yeah, you should feel really bad. Cause you ruined my day, week and month. I cannot believe a person would gossip like that, draw such absurd conclusions... you seriously need to look at yourself, because that was an awful AWFUL thing you just did. Yes, I write very frankly and openly. I like to look back in…Read more …

Momentary Lapse of Meh

I dreamed we were driving, somewhere outside a strange world in which Detroit and Boston are less than an hour by car. We were driving to a fight with another gang. On the radio, a song played. It's the second time I've heard this song in a dream, but I know the song isn't real: it's just a song in my dream. The first time I heard it in a dream, I wrote the lyrics I heard down: the world is a trap and life is crap even with a map you can't…Read more …

Stupid Cat

This morning, I could not find my wallet. I was pissed. I started looking all over for my wallet, because I only put my wallet in a few places to avoid this kind of thing. I started to think "Oh crud (friendly thought language), I must have dropped it at Trader Joes or something last night!" So I started ripping the house apart, because I didn't want to think I lost the wallet in an empty store. Finally, I get to the small bedroom where Fargo's food and litter box are. Fargo likes…Read more …

Deep Thoughts and other crap

What if this is just the beginning? There's some story or another about 3 earth-like planets found around a star recently. Scientists claim it's too hot there to support Earth-style life, but they also make teh point that finding these planets proves that it's a "crowded" universe. So, if we assume there are lots and lots and lots of planets out there... you can make two assumptions: 1. You can assume that the universe and everything in it was created for US. Only US. Us being humans, ya know? 2. You can assume…Read more …

Adoption

Just posting my mind on the adoption stuff... It amazes me how much Chris and Kim are going through to become parents. They have to prove beyond all reasonable doubt that they will be fit parents. Not just fit... they have to ace the test. They have to get straight A's and present themselves as... I dunno... 1950's Ward and June Cleaver or something. They have to travel around the world twice, present themselves in a court that speaks a language they don't understand, and put their lives and the fate of their…Read more …

I hate the Hellhole

I hate this place. With all my heart. I do not like it here, and it has nothing to do with the place. I simply do not trust the management of this condo association in the slightest. Witness the atrocity that has sprung DIRECTLY OUTSIDE MY FRONT DOOR: I don't know what else to do. All their work is destructive. This place is SO UGLY now, I swear, it has to lower the value of my house 10k. What am I supposed to do? I feel completely POWERLESS here. Right now, I'm waiting…Read more …